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I'm guessing it wasn't as eventful as started simple enough, off to Lakeside with She Who Shall Remain Anonymous (SWSRA) up the A127, tried to turn off at the A128 only to find it completely snarled up then on to the M25, again, to find that chocca as well, fortunately SWSRA knew a back route through Upminster, so a little out of the way but kept moving none the less, now I'm going to digress.....I'm sure most of you are aware of such a thing as 6 degrees of separation, well this was more like a catastrophe of events. It all starts with two of our lovely customers, whom again shall remain anonymous! who begged and pleaded and kicked and cried to get on our already fully booked year album course (well actually they both asked very politely with just a little grovelling), us being the gorgeous lovely people that we are said YES, now this meant that I would have to get my lovely hubby to make our work tables longer, as they only seat 10, so off I trots to Ikea to get some legs (2 of), done that no problem, goes into lakeside, done a bit of girly shopping, as you do, everything that SWSRA picks out they have no stock of so she has to pay extra for home delivery, but it's worth it the top is GORGEOUS and it's for a very special date. Next we move on to food, at this point I would like to whole heartedly recommend Cafe Rouge, the Garlic Bread Sticks are simply yummy and VERY GARLICY!!! Panicked when they said they didn't have any straws, I only like to drink through a straw, sorry Type A and all that!!! eventually they found some (good people) and we proceeded through chicken ceasar salad and then dessert it was all VERY TASTY and the SERVICE was excellent. Called Ricky from CR to tell him I'd got some legs when HE suggested I go back and get two more, so off we trots back to Ikea, when SWSRA pulls out in front of a MOVING car, if that's not worrying enough that fact that she couldn't see what she'd done wrong was more worrying, so we parks up goes in and gets two more legs, whilst there SWSRA sees a unit she's wanted for a while on special offer, so trolley in hand we try to lift it and boy it's HEAVY, then out of nowhere along comes our Knight in Shinning Armour, well blue jeans and a T Shirt actually "would you like some help ladies?" "Oooh yes please we squeal" so he flexes his muscles and proceeds to lift, it's then that he realises maybe he shouldn't have been so gallant, but bless him he managed it in the end and off we strolls to the check out, we exchange money and SWSRA gets a desire to do a wee, she emerges after a while with her mobile in one hand and her battery in the other, it dropped on the floor, but it could have been worse as it could have gone down the loo, now that would be BAD!! I suggest that she brings the car round to the loading bay, I wait for a while then I hear a sort of intermittent siren and realise it's her and her car alarm is going off and that her key fob is broke and therefore it cannot be switched off (stay with me ladies, I know it's a long one) we're desperately trying to disable it, everyone is staring and then all hell breaks loose as she decides to PANIC, she phones Green Line, telling them we're two stranded women, it's dark and there are children at home, "Yeah should be within the hour" say's the nice lady at Green Flag, "look" I say "you can drive it home, it'll be fun people will think it's a police car and get out of our way and when you get to your house we'll disconnect the battery" is that a good suggestion?? NO !!! SWSRA gets on the phone to her brother screaming like a banshee at him outside Ikea, people are really starring now and having a little snigger, so I just go hide myself in the car and duck down, then another car pulls up next to us and now SWSRA's alarm is setting their alarm off!!! we kindly ask a lovely Ikea employee if he has any experience at disabling car alarms, we assure him we are not the police, he has a look bless him, to no avail, SWSRA goes into Ikeas's Customer Service area jumps the line, she's beyond caring now, and gets a screw driver (it's like something out of the shinning)!!! decides to take apart the key fob, the first tiny and I mean tiny screw comes loose, she hands it to me and I drop it, doh!!! The Ikea employee comes back over (I'm going to call him Horatio) and takes the key fob less screws and has a fiddle and......eventually disables the alarm, oh my, horatio's our hero, we jump for joy I find a fiver and stick it in his hand at which point he throws his arms around me and starts kissing me (on the cheek) and actually lifts me off the ground (he was a very strong man) Everything returns to normal, as calm as can be SWSRA calls back Green Line, "Hello, I'd like to cancel a call out please, Thank you" and off we trot leaving the other car alarm to carry on the noise destruction, I did forget to mention that in the process, SWSRA calls her mums and now has her worried, calls her dad, nothing wrong in that, but hey she isn't to know he was ASLEEP and the brother she called was actually in the BATH. Now I know she won't mind me writing this as she knows how much I LOVE her and let's face it she made it a VERY FUNNY evening, well, I laughed AFTER she'd given the screwdriver back!!! how was your Thursday evening???


  1. OMG Marion what a Thursday evening, mine was uneventful compared to yours! You've had me in stitches reading your post :)

    Have a good weekend. See you soon.

    Alex x

  2. It could only happen to you xxx Well, it normally is me so I am feeling secure in knowing that there are others that "it happens to"!!!!! You are so funny... I wonder if they have CCTV !!! See you tomorrow xxxxx


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